Bio: Timmy Mallett was a children's TV presenter who was best known for his morning show Wacaday, which aired on ITV from 1985 to 1992.
In 2009, Mr Mallett was a guest on panel show Never Mind The Buzzcocks. However, BBC2 failed to air the episode due to 'quality reasons' and Mr Mallett's panel show career quickly ended after his appearance on an episode of Mock The Week was edited out entirely.
Mr Mallett also had a brief spell appearing at the O2 Academy's Old School Indie night in Islington, where he would invite club goers up to the stage for a series of numeracy questions with incorrect answers leading to contestants being hit over the head with his iconic mallet. Mr Mallett's affiliation with the club was terminated after three weeks due to fighting.
A client asked me to get him a goat's milk frappuccino with almond sprinkles, but I didn't know what that was so I decided to email my colleagues a fun fact about Timmy Mallett instead:
From: Paul Levy
Sent: 11 July 2013 15:43
To: All
Subject: Timmy Mallett's Hungarian Banishment
Children’s entertainer Timmy Mallett is banned from Hungary.
In 1990, while riding high with the popular Wackaday program, Mr Mallett launched a range of children’s candy shaped like his famous mascot Mallett’s Mallet. Due to the hammer like shape however, the candy was banned from being sold in the UK due to choking fears.
With Wackaday being the most popular children’s TV show in Hungary, Mr Mallett saw an opportunity to off-load the near 30,000 cases of candy. On hearing the health fears, Hungary Head of State Mátyás Szűrös, was not keen on launching the product, but due to Mr Mallett’s popularity in the country he was able to arrange a meeting with Mr Szűrös and other state officials.
In an ill-advised stunt however, when Mátyás Szűrös greeted Mr Mallett at the airport, Mr Mallett introduced himself to the Head of State with the famous Mallett's Mallet whack on the head in front of the national press, greatly offending the state officials and enraging Mr. Szűrös.
Mr Mallett was banned on the spot from entering the country, was marched back on the plane and promptly flown back to the UK.
It is reported that the candy is still in storage due to its long expiry date caused by an undisclosed ingredient.
Mátyás Szűrös mentioned Mr Mallett in his memoirs, referring to the entertainer as “a cheap clown that only the smallest of children can tolerate”.
From: Sally Harper
Sent: 11 July 2013 15:59
To: All
Subject: Timmy Mallett's Hungarian Banishment
When I was a kid I sent a picture I had drawn to Wacaday. But on the episode it was meant to be shown on a bunch of aliens invaded the set and ate all the pictures. Timmy just stood by and let it happen.
I didn't watch Wacaday any more after that.
From: Philip Lemon
Sent: 11 July 2013 16:03
To: All
Subject: Timmy Mallett's Hungarian Banishment
I'm very sorry to hear that Sally. I would like to see your picture some time. I like to paint myself. I mainly paint empty chairs in dusty rooms.
From: Sally Harper
Sent: 11 July 2013 16:10
To: All
Subject: Timmy Mallett's Hungarian Banishment
I can't show you my picture Philip, as I said it was eaten by aliens as Timmy Mallett watched while making puns about how 'wacky' the situation was. But I can describe the painting to you:
It was of a man who sat around writing letters to women who only ever replied with sarcasm and derision, but the man was too dim and arrogant to notice the contempt of their tone. One day he was killed by a tractor while crossing the road to deliver one of his letters - a fate that the electronic age saves many a man from.
From: Philip Lemon
Sent: 11 July 2013 16:16
To: All
Subject: Timmy Mallett's Hungarian Banishment
It sounded wonderful. I'll pop over to your desk in a moment to discuss how you managed to portray such depth in a single painting.
From: Robert Carr
Sent: 11 July 2013 16:16
To: All
Subject: Timmy Mallett's Hungarian Banishment
I have sent an official complaint to HR about being kept cc'd in on these emails. I expect not to be bothered by them anymore.
Also, does anyone know where I can get a goat's milk frappuccino with almond sprinkles from? A client said he asked someone to get him one half an hour ago!
